I admit I get excited by the mail.  When those  glossy catalogs show up at my door I can feel my heart skip a beat.  What amazing contraption has Pottery Barn discovered that will make my life and home more organized?  What sheets does The Company Store have that will make my slumber so much better?  What chairs do I need from Ballard Designs to complete my life?  What dress does Garnet Hill have that will match the amazing boots I saw in the  J. Peterman catalog?

Okay, you get the picture.  I have a problem.  I love to shop.  I love catalogs.  I did once love the mail, but now it is bittersweet.  I live in Hawaii and apparently all of these companies do not know that Hawaii is an actual state.  I once found a FABULOUS french bee pillow in the Ballard Designs catalog and it was on sale…I jumped online and ordered the pillow only to find out the shipping would be twice the cost of the pillow!

This makes no since to me.  I lived in Germany for 5 years and I had an APO address there.  All of my mail went to a tiny post office box and I picked it up there.  In those 5 years I had things shipped from every catalog or online shop I know.  I once had a loveseat shipped from Overstock.com and it was free shipping!  So, you can see it boggles my shopping mind how a pillow should cost me $25 and then almost $50 in shipping.

The mail is now a form of torture.  I still get all those wonderful catalogs, but looking thru the glossy pages just makes my heart hurt.  Oh, how I want those wonderful matching hand carved elephant stools for my living room and those Parisian inspired lamps for my bedroom……but guess what?  I cannot have them.  They either will not ship to me or they will charge me hundreds of dollars.

The most bizarre thing is that I cannot order sheets from Pottery Barn, but I did order The Total Gym (the Chuck Norris machine) and they shipped that thing here for free!  What the heck is that about?  It weighs a ton and is in a HUGE box.

Maybe it is the power of Chuck Norris.  If he owned Pottery Barn I would be writing this from my brand new chaise lounge with tropical bird themed upholstery…but instead I am on my crappy brown couch…..

Mahalo Mr. Postman